Tag: memoir

Review – All That Remains

Posted October 6, 2024 by Nicky in Reviews / 1 Comment

Review – All That Remains

All That Remains: A Life In Death

by Sue Black

Genres: Memoir, Non-fiction, Science
Pages: 368
Rating: five-stars
Synopsis:

Sue Black confronts death every day. As a Professor of Anatomy and Forensic Anthropology, she focuses on mortal remains in her lab, at burial sites, at scenes of violence, murder and criminal dismemberment, and when investigating mass fatalities due to war, accident or natural disaster. In All That Remains she reveals the many faces of death she has come to know, using key cases to explore how forensic science has developed, and examining what her life and work has taught her.

Do we expect a book about death to be sad? Macabre? Sue's book is neither. There is tragedy, but there is also humour in stories as gripping as the best crime novel.

Sue Black’s All that Remains is more personal than her other book, Written in Bone. Much of it still discusses her work as a forensic anthropologist, but it also discusses her early experiences of death, discusses a bit about how she can see horrors and compartmentalise them away from the rest of her life, and talks about how she views death personally, and how she’d like to die.

Throughout, her writing is straight-forward, unflinching from gory details, but clinical. In every case, you get the sense of Black’s respect for people, no matter who they are, where they come from, and the details of their lives: if you had to be identified in this way by someone, you’d hope it was her.

Her attitude to death is one that I’d like to internalise more, being an anxiety-ridden mess about all things that touch on death (thanks, trauma). Her work makes for difficult reading in some ways, but her straightforward, unfearing attitude alongside her respect helped me see things more her way (at least for a while). I cried at some of the stories here (stories about her own family, stories about her time in Kosovo, etc), but not in a bad way. One should feel moved by this kind of thing.

Rating: 5/5

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Review – Hyphen

Posted June 13, 2024 by Nicky in Reviews / 2 Comments

Review – Hyphen

Hyphen

by Pardis Mahdavi

Genres: History, Memoir, Non-fiction
Pages: 160
Series: Object Lessons
Rating: three-stars
Synopsis:

To hyphenate or not to hyphenate has been a central point of controversy since before the imprinting of the first Gutenberg Bible. And yet, the hyphen has persisted, bringing and bridging new words and concepts.

Hyphen follows the story of the hyphen from antiquity - Hyphen" is derived from an ancient Greek word meaning "to tie together" - to the present, but also uncovers the politics of the hyphen and the role it plays in creating identities. The journey of this humble piece of connective punctuation reveals the quiet power of an orthographic concept to speak to the travails of hyphenated individuals all over the world. Hyphen is ultimately a compelling story about the powerful ways that language and identity intertwine.

Mahdavi - herself a hyphenated Iranian-American - weaves in her own experiences struggling to find her own sense of self amidst feelings of betwixt and between. We meet six other individuals who are each on a similar journey and watch as they find a way to embrace the space of the hyphen - rejecting the false choice of trying to fit into previously prescribed identities. Through their stories, we collectively consider how belonging only serves to fulfill the failures of troubled states, regimes, or institutions and offer possibilities to navigate, articulate, and empower new identities.

Pardis Mahdavi’s take on the Object Lessons series, Hyphen, is part-informative, part-memoir, and it’s a format that works well. I still far prefer the books that focus in on the object in question, but this one alternates the two quite well, using the one to help to illuminate the other. It’s probably one that will make a different kind of sense to Americans, since a good portion of the discussion is about “hyphenated Americans” (a phrasing I haven’t heard before, but which apparently has a history), and it delves into the history around that.

Not that immigrants in other countries don’t have similar stories, but I’d also hesitate to generalise. There are certainly parallels with “hyphenated British” experience, and it’s certainly not better here, just different (though increasingly the same all over, I guess; thanks globalisation).

Anyway, Mahdavi’s take on the hyphen wasn’t perhaps the detailed history of punctuation that I might find fascinating (though I have read a book about hyphens before, if memory serves), but it was interesting.

Rating: 3/5

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Review – Everything is OK

Posted May 13, 2024 by Nicky in Reviews / 2 Comments

Review – Everything is OK

Everything is OK

by Debbie Tung

Genres: Graphic Novels, Memoir, Non-fiction
Pages: 184
Rating: two-stars
Synopsis:

Everything Is OK is the story of Debbie Tung’s struggle with anxiety and her experience with depression. She shares what it’s like navigating life, overthinking every possible worst-case scenario, and constantly feeling like all hope is lost.

The book explores her journey to understanding the importance of mental health in her day-to-day life and how she learns to embrace the highs and lows when things feel out of control. Debbie opens up about deeply personal issues and the winding road to recovery, discovers the value of self-love, and rebuilds a more mindful relationship with her mental health.

In this graphic memoir, Debbie aims to provide positive and comforting messages to anyone who is facing similar difficulties or is just trying to get through a tough time in life. She hopes to encourage readers to be kinder to themselves, to know that they are not alone, and that it’s okay to be vulnerable because they are not defined by their mental health struggles. The dark clouds won’t be there forever. Everything will turn out all right.

Debbie Tung’s Everything is OK is a journey through the artist’s experience of depression and anxiety, interspersed with one-page spreads illustrating various “inspirational” phrases and hints about dealing with anxiety and depression. Her art is cute, and she makes good use of colour to bring across the right moods.

I don’t want to critique someone else’s journey with mental health problems. And I’m sure there are people who’ve found this uplifting and helpful in their own journey — many of the things she says are good sense.

What it isn’t is a handbook to recovery from anxiety and depression, even though at times it’s phrased as general advice to everyone. For anyone whose situation is different or very complex, though, it risks coming across just as hackeyed and tone-deaf as the voices Tung depicts as bringing her down (people who say “just get over it”, “you’re doing this for attention”, etc). It’s no universal panacea, and there are many people for whom basic therapy doesn’t help, or doesn’t help enough. The journey she depicts in this book is an incredibly lucky one — which is great for her, but isn’t the answer to all the mental health problems in quite the way that some reviewers think. Just as it’s not as simple as “pull yourself together”, it’s also not as simple as “stop criticising yourself and learn to live with your flaws”.

Which, to be scrupulously fair, Tung doesn’t say — but nor does she really address it. The book does mention different journeys, but it doesn’t touch on the absolute depths. I wouldn’t give this to someone to help them “understand” depression, because it can’t do that job. I’d give it to Debbie Tung’s friends and family, to help them understand her depression and anxiety, and if someone identifies with the picture of depression in these pages, no doubt it can be useful in the same way. But please, for the love of chickens, don’t give it out as a general instruction book, please.

Rating: 2/5

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Review – Wine

Posted May 3, 2024 by Nicky in Reviews / 0 Comments

Review – Wine

Wine

by Meg Bernhard

Genres: Memoir, Non-fiction
Pages: 159
Series: Object Lessons
Rating: three-stars
Synopsis:

While wine drunk millennia ago was the humble beverage of the people, today the drink is inextricable with power, sophistication, and often wealth. Bottles sell for half a million dollars. Point systems tell us which wines are considered the best. Wine professionals give us the language to describe what we taste.

Agricultural product and cultural commodity, drink of ritual and drink of addiction, purveyor of pleasure, pain, and memory - wine has never been contained in a single glass. Drawing from science, religion, literature, and memoir, Wine meditates on the power structures bound up with making and drinking this ancient, intoxicating beverage.

Like a lot of the Object Lessons books I’ve read recently, Meg Bernhard’s Wine is something of a memoir. At the same time, though, it does stick pretty close to the topic, and discusses the making of wine in a fairly close and involved manner: Bernhard went to vineyards and put herself to work, and spent time drinking the finished products in a thoughtful way.

As a result, it balances the personal (of which there is quite a bit) with interesting titbits about how wine is made, the impacts of climate change on wine production (such as the impact of wildfires and the wines that have to be made due to the smoke taint on the grape skins), and about how we relate to wine. It also discusses women in the wine industry, the difficulty of breaking through as a master sommelier in a highly male-dominated environment (where men have outright used their status to abuse women).

It’s still a highly personal book, discussing Bernhard’s personal relationship with alcoholic, her blackouts, the sexual assault she suffered when drinking heavily, her relationship with her father who has similar issues. But it manages to balance that with information, with a grounding in fact, and it works well.

Rating: 3/5

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Review – A Bookshop of One’s Own

Posted April 25, 2024 by Nicky in Reviews / 0 Comments

Review – A Bookshop of One’s Own

A Bookshop of One's Own

by Jane Cholmeley

Genres: History, Memoir, Non-fiction
Pages: 340
Rating: four-stars
Synopsis:

Silver Moon was the dream of three women – a bookshop with the mission to promote the work of female writers and create a much-needed safe space for any woman. Founded in 1980s London against a backdrop of homophobia and misogyny, it was a testament to the power of community, growing into Europe’s biggest women’s bookshop and hosting a constellation of literary stars from Margaret Atwood and Maya Angelou to Angela Carter. While contending with day-to-day struggles common to other booksellers, plus the additional burdens of misogyny and the occasional hate crime, Jane Cholmeley and her booksellers created a thriving business. But they also played a crucial and relatively unsung part in one the biggest social movements of our time.

A Bookshop of One’s Own is a fascinating slice of social history from the heart of the women’s liberation movement, from a true feminist and lesbian icon. Written with heart and humour, it reveals the struggle and joy that comes with starting an underdog business, while being a celebration of the power women have to change the narrative when they are the ones holding the pen.

What was it like to start a feminist bookshop, in an industry dominated by men? How could a lesbian thrive in Thatcher’s time, with the government legislating to restrict her rights? How do you run a business when your real aim is to change the world?

Silver Moon was a feminist bookshop in London — one of the first in the UK, and ultimately the largest in Europe, with the aims of showing there was a market for books for women, books about women, books about lesbians, etc, in all kinds of genres. They started out naive and hopeful, and mostly kept the hope alive through the years of downturns and bastard landlords and men coming in to wank in front of the lesbian bookshelves (really).

Jane Cholmeley was one of the founders, and this book is a little bit her memoir, and mostly the story of the bookshop. It’s selective, of course, though Cholmeley tries to have her eyes open to her own faults, and muses at times on what she did wrong, or on situations she might’ve handled differently. It’s clear that it was an important resource for many, and the support for LGBT women came at just the right time during a period where gays and lesbians needed visibility, to be given a place where they were normal, because of Thatcher’s section 28.

Sometimes it’s infuriating and depressing, sometimes you have to roll your eyes at the earnest naivety of two young feminists starting a bookshop with relatively little knowledge of the requirements, sometimes you just have to cheer them on. And I very much appreciated Cholmeley’s self-examination, and her eagerness to include the anecdotes and perspectives of the people who worked at Silver Moon, including those which were critical.

It sounds like it was a lovely and vital place, and it made me sad for all we lost in the closing down of the bookshops (not just Silver Moon) on Charing Cross Road.

Rating: 4/5

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Review – Sticker

Posted April 19, 2024 by Nicky in Reviews / 2 Comments

Review – Sticker

Sticker

by Henry Hoke

Genres: Memoir, Non-fiction
Pages: 152
Series: Object Lessons
Rating: one-star
Synopsis:

Stickers adorn our first memories, dot our notebooks and our walls, are stuck annoyingly on fruit, and accompany us into adulthood to shout our perspectives from car bumpers. They hold surprising power in their ability to define and provoke, and hold a strange steadfast presence in our age of fading physical media. Henry Hoke employs a constellation of stickers to explore queer boyhood, parental disability, and ancestral violence. A memoir in 20 stickers, Sticker is set against the backdrop of the encroaching neo-fascist presence in Hoke's hometown of Charlottesville, Virginia, which results in the fatal terrorist attack of August 12th and its national aftermath.

Unfortunately, I seem to be having bad luck with my Object Lessons choices lately. I enjoy the ones which pick into the history of an everyday object and try to understand it, like Personal Stereo and Blue Jeans. I’m less a fan of the memoir type, and Henry Hoke’s Sticker falls into that category. It’s a life told through tenuous connections with stickers, from the stickers his mother put on bottles of dangerous household cleaning products to the parental advisory stickers on CDs and onward.

There’s absolutely a place in this world for this kind of memoir, and the story of a gay kid growing up in Charlottesville is a story worth telling. I want to be clear that it’s not that I don’t think the story should be told at all. I’m just not a fan of it in this series, and nor is it something I particularly seek out to read (nor memoir in general). Just not for me.

So, if you’re looking for something that discusses the history or wider cultural relevance of stickers, this ain’t remotely it. Which is a pity, because that book would be fascinating. This book is about Henry Hoke.

Rating: 1/5

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