Apparently, Sir Cameron Needs to Die

by Greer Stothers

Genres: Fantasy
Pages: 383
Rating:

Synopsis:

In this hilarious, off-the-wall queer fantasy romance, a reclusive sorcerer is forced to protect a cowardly knight after a prophecy ties their fates together.

Funny, touching and inventive, this book is perfect for fans of A Marvellous Light and Dreadful.

All his life, Sir Cameron has tried to stay as far away from danger as possible. But when the Church hands down a prophecy to his fellow knights predicting that the only way to defeat their nemesis, the mad sorcerer Merulo, is to kill Sir Cameron, he finds himself in a situation too sticky for even his considerable wiles. Short of ideas, Cameron throws himself on the mercy of the one person who now actually wants him to survive: the mad sorcerer.

Merulo isn't thrilled to be babysitting a spoilt, attention-seeking knight, but fate has tied them together. And transmogrifying Cameron into a vulture is at least a great source of entertainment. Cameron, meanwhile, is on a voyage of self-discovery. It turns out he's really, really into surly sorcerers who lock him up and tell him what to do. Who knew?

As a legion of knights surround their stronghold, led by an angry concussed elf—which definitely isn't in any way Cameron's fault—the sorcerer's poisonous ambitions draw ever closer to fruition. Cameron is quite invested in not dying, but he finds he's also invested in Merulo. And sometimes, supporting the sorcerer you care about means taking an interest in their hobbies. Even if their hobby is trying to kill God.

Even if it might get you killed, too.

I was quite interested in Greer Stothers’ Apparently, Sir Cameron Has To Die from early buzz, though I think the summary I read is not the one on the back cover or the current one on store-fronts: I’d probably have known it almost certainly wasn’t for me if I’d seen it referred to as “hilarious” and “off-the-wall”. That’s really the primary problem with this book for me: I bounced off fairly early on because it’s trying so hard to be funny, and the scatological humour actually isn’t the height of wit that it seems to think it is.

Before we go on, it’s my understanding that I need to point out that I’m writing this review for other readers, not to target Stothers, because apparently they’ve been posting bad reviews on their Tumblr and responding to them. I have found no direct evidence of this myself, but I also haven’t looked for long, and I can definitely tell that Stothers is Very Extremely Tumblr so it doesn’t… surprise me.

I also had some issues with Sir Cameron’s anxiety being treated as a joke and as cowardice. I know that’s the character’s and world’s framing, not the author’s (necessarily), but it just crosses a personal line. Being afraid of dying isn’t cowardice. Wanting to avoid fighting in a war isn’t, in fact, unreasonable (though unless I missed it, I think there was no real explanation there as to why Sir Cameron is a knight at all given he doesn’t want to fight). It was… unpleasant, to read that constantly being viewed as just cowardice, even given the bounds of the setting.

Then there’s everything pointed out in other reviews: weird gender essentialism, unnecessary fetishism about women’s bodies, utter disgust and horror about menstruation, Glenda the cartoon-level bigot who we are forced to spend a fair bit of time with, the “tawny-skinned” female character with her “wild” hair and bulging muscles, attitudes toward disability (and assistive technology)…

And on top of all that, there is zero (zero) chemistry between the characters, even in scenes where the author firmly wants us to believe there is. It’s just awkward and out of the blue.

In fairness, some of this is a “your mileage may vary” sort of thing depending on how you feel about some story/setting choices, some of it is well-intentioned, and I think some of it is just accidental… but the sum of all those parts is not (for me) an enjoyable read, and I definitely understand that it feels like the author is, whether blunderingly or deliberately and with whatever motives, engaging in bigoted stereotypes.

Rating: 1/5 (“didn’t like it”)